Can you tame a corporation?

The train of resignation heading to the payrise station via your boss’s approval and fight with your manager, derailed on the corner of cost-cutting measures and performance appraisal and hit the loan installment station before it terminated at the Fancy Residential Area. All remarks please send directly to the address: youwillnever@becomeapartner.com. Have a safe journey!

I’m not a true-born resident of Warsaw, but I do live there. I am a so-called canning jar, which is a sort of jar (i.e.the person who visits family on weekends and brings home-made food in jars), that lives further than 100 km away from the capital city. Like many, I arrived to Warsaw in order to develop my career. In the past I worked for NGOs, currently I joined the start-up world. I admit, in the past I have successfully flirted with huge international organisations, which I don’t regret at all. I will sustain from preaching about rewards or drawbacks of possessing a magnetic badge that opens every glass door on the 30th floor of a skyscrapern in the centre of Warsaw, but I interact with big corporations quite a lot, which allowed me to form an opinion of my own.

A corporation holds you lovingly in its arms and provides savety (health insurance), entertainment (gym membership) and promieses (promotion, payrise, a golden cage). Amount of work alters with seasons, as it does in agriculture. Staff rotates and you may get lucky. Atmosphere is the resultant of all the above-mentioned factors. A corporation lullabies you and dull’s your vigilance.

A corporation is an overprotective mother that will teach you basic rules of life, but if it doesn’t allow you to grow with her, it will disadvantage you for years. Contrary to a loving dedicated mother, a corporation (if you don’t use her) will abandon you. It doesn’t love you and you are totally replecable. It will suck off your vital juices and will take away your badge, responsibilities and life purpose.

Although, I see its huge social and economic utility, I simply cannot understand the omnipresent excitement about having a magnetic badge or the prestige of the boring navyblue-white dresscode. If human’s value is supposed to stem from the fact that one lets their boss set his targets and life goals or they bad mouth collegues, then it is bullshit. It is rather dehumanizing and has nothing to do with high-life. Of course, corporations are not all the same, yet some of them create conditions in which the demons in people are awaken. Workers get discouraged by the routine, they cease to look for a deeper sense of their actions and they hibernate their brains in their sculls squashed from stress. I do not know a single person who says that they want to spend their life in such institution.

The conclusion is clear. Treat the corporation the way it treats you. Learn from each other, earn for each other, take advantage of each other, but always stay ready for a brutal good-bye..


P.S. Lifehack: the cost of printing the attribute of prestige – i.e. business cards is up to hundred zlotys. You can put on them anything, even „Princess Sissi” or „Sex Instructor”. It means that you don’t have to belong to the consulting sect in order to be able to impress your village friends.

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